Please know that I not writing this from a place of judgement, but from a place of conviction. I too, have wanted to read 50 Shades of Grey and watch the movie. I’ve asked myself how, as an avid reader, could I not read this book that has spent so much time on the NY Times Bestseller List? How can I not see this movie that is selling out theaters? But time and time again, as the temptation overcame me and book/movie hype increased, my Heavenly Father gave me a spirit of wisdom and discernment. He used a Sunday School Song, Bible verses, blog posts, statistics, and other Godly women to show me a better way.
50 Reasons Why I’m Not Watching “50 Shades of Grey”
1. From my childhood Sunday School class, “O be careful little eyes what you see, O be careful little eyes what you see, For the Father up above is looking down in love, O be careful little eyes what you see!” Listen here.
2. “Erotica/porn teaches you to be sexually aroused by looking away from your partner, not toward him. You may be engaging your body with him, but your imagination is with some fictional character. That’s not intimacy.”-Dr. Juli Slattery, Authentic Intimacy
3. “Erotica and porn impact your brain in a manner that breeds tolerance. What was sexually arousing a few months ago will no longer be enough to produce the same sexual high. This is how men and women get drawn into increasingly hard-core porn and/or sexually acting out what they have seen or read.” -Dr. Juli Slattery, Authentic Intimacy
4. “What they may not realize is that books like Fifty Shades sets them up for rejection. Just like a woman can’t compete with the porn her husband is looking at, a man can’t compete with a fantasy man like Christian Grey.” -Dr. Juli Slattery, Authentic Intimacy
5. A recent Michigan State University survey found that young women who had read Fifty Shades of Grey were more likely to be in abusive relationships.
6. Good media discernment is about guarding our eyes and hearts before we watch or listen. Plugged In.
7. “Evil’s primary attack on sexuality is to simplify it—to separate the physical act of sex from human love and divine design. Every time sex is abused or distorted as it is in erotica, the physical act is split off from the relational and spiritual elements of sex. Erotica is aimed at awakening your physical sexual desire without any connection to emotional, relational, or spiritual reality.” -Dannah Gresh, Pure Freedom
8. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.” -Romans 12:2 (NIV)
9. “The Bible has said for thousands of years that lust is hurtful and harmful. Guess what? Biopsychologists and others are studying the effects of lust, pornography, and erotica on the brain and the body. They are finding that the Bible was, in fact, right. Over time your body becomes conditioned to self-stimulation and gratification. It’s not just a preference. It’s physiological. The lust cuts a literal pathway in your brain tissue that’s kinda like a rut. A rut you better be prepared to get stuck in. While at first a little bit of erotica might give you a taste for your spouse, overtime that rut reminds you how great you are at self-stimulation and how powerful your imagination can be. You’ll become less interested in real sex with your husband. (Both SELF magazine and The New Yorker ran articles on this phenomenon in recent years. They both suggested that if you want to have a great sex life, you better push pause on porn!) The fact is, erotica robs you of real sex. It’s not good for your marriage or future marriage.” -Dannah Gresh, Pure Freedom
10. “I believes Christian and non-Christian women seek out the book for the same reason: they want the passion that exudes from the pages to happen in their real lives, especially if their emotional needs and even sexual needs are not being met in their real life relationships. Women should turn to God instead. Without a genuine relationship with Christ, it’s our belief that women will continue to seek satisfaction for their emotional needs in places that just won’t ever fully satisfy.” -Crystal Renaud, Dirty Girls Ministries
11. Christian blogger and professor Mary Kassian writes that “the relationship between a man and wife is to mirror Christ’s relationship to His Bride” and “Christ is not into domination, control, abuse, and humiliation.” She also objects to heroine Anastasia Steele’s submissive role: “the Lord doesn’t want His daughters to be wilting, weak-willed, wimpy women who welcome and enjoy abuse.”
12. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” -Philippians 4:8 (NIV)
I know the blog post title said, “50 Reasons Why I’m not Watching 50 Shades of Grey” and I only provided 12. I did that on purpose. I want to hear from you. Why aren’t you going to see the movie? Why didn’t you read the book?
Does this post make you mad?
These are my personal convictions. Get on your knees and talk to Jesus. Ask him for his direction in your life. Can you picture him in the theater next to you? I’ve had to ask myself this question.
Did you have a change of heart?
Praise the Lord! Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery have written a book called, Pulling Back the Shades and now women from around the world are invited to mail in their copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. In exchange, they will mail you a copy of Pulling Back the Shades for free! This book addresses God’s design for intimacy, and shows why erotica is exploiting women’s longings rather than satisfying them. It also addresses questions women are unsure where to go for answers, and talks about how you can be a sexual and spiritual woman.
A Thought to Ponder…
Women are driving these book sales. Women are buying these movies tickets.
What if women spent their time campaigning for something good, something pure, something worth our energy and effort? The possibilities are endless. Women truly hold up “half the sky.”